My Not-Exactly-A-Vacation Hit List:
- One ridiculously long security line (where they asked me if I would take off my stroller’s wheels. Not kidding) eleven elevators and a man who had gas and literally lifted his butt and pointed it in my direction. Foul.
- Creating centerpieces and favors for the wedding lunch. Tied tulle bows for more than 100 chocolate-kiss wedding snacks.
- Mom’s dog eating the wedding favors. (My kids were super entertained by what they saw in his poop. GROSS!! Ribbon, tulle, wrappers…at least he didn’t die).
- Hearing my mom scream like she’d discovered a dead body when she found the dog eating the favors. I’m slightly deaf in one ear now, but it was still awesome.
- Listening to my kids laugh as they ran around in my parents huge backyard. Without shoes. “Mom! They don’t have ticks here!”
- My husband showing up the night before the wedding and surprising us all.
- Baby blowing out (up her back) ten seconds before wedding pictures.
- Having people stare at me because my baby’s diaper leaked all over my lap on the plane ride home. It totally looked like I peed my pants.
- My grandma crying when she saw my husband at the wedding.
- Finding out that my dog destroyed the dog sitters house (tore down curtains, chewed floor moldings, pooped in their crate four times).
- Toes getting crushed by rude man who wheeled his bag over my foot and then gave me a dirty look.
- Having a pedicure with my mom and sisters.
Summer is almost over, but I hope you’ve enjoyed it!
And Jessica Lawson, you’re the winner of the full critique! Please send the rest of Tripp’s story!